week of ferragosto

Memorable. We have spent plenty of time at the local beaches, a new place every day. Visited a couple of sight-seeing spots, like the castle at Le Castella, or the town of Santa Severina for a dinner of typical regional food (heavy on the cheeses and the sausages...) Mornings of sleep for all. Me, lots of sleepless nights. Enjoying the company, feeling every moment. Communal lunches and dinners, games of cards, walks around town... fun fun!

I have finally dug into some of my italian roots. Being with 5 other italians, all my same age, has given me a chance to fill 15 years of cultural gaps. It's like an accelerated course of adolescence through adulthood. I even found someone who understands all the languages I speak. I can switch between them, mess up, and I am still understood. I still live a borrowed life, I am still the foreigner... but I am slowly integrating, I found some vestigial roots. I am starting to feel complete. I have even had brief fantasies of settling down and start a family of my own. I might be finally achieving balance. It is scary. But It also feels right. I have a feeling of home. I missed it.

No worries, I still have some ways to go. I am still a random speck in the world, the battlegirl you all know. A friend has dubbed me "Miss Brown". A particle constantly in motion, pushed by the environment. I still have to backtrack to my earlier childhood. Find some family information. Place myself into this world a bit more. But it's getting closer. Life is funny. It is full of surprises if only you give yourself a chance to be open and try to experience things.

As I look back on pictures of this trip, the people I've seen, the people that have come and gone, those that will always remain, those that I will possibly never see again... I feel a mixture of elation and sadness. What is there to life, really? What are the things to worry about, and what are those that are so superficial, they just hurt you in an instant, but are not to be considered for the long haul? Morals, cultural definitions, they are all so subjective... It's all about respect for those around you, but for yourself most of all.

I wish there was a way to integrate my worlds a bit more. Make the physical distances shorter. I miss everyone so. Some I will always regret not having gotten closer to when I had the chance. But life can always be amazing, if you give yourself the right opportunities. You never know what can still happen.

Aaight, enough philosophizing. The last visitors left yesterday morning. It's now back to myself and my friend. She is back to her 9 to 5, so I have a chance to catch up on blog and things. I got a train ticket to go back to Genova Thu morning. My 30th bday is coming up, there's some celebrating to do! Through Sep. 9 I am going to be hanging around up north, looking up other friends I haven't visited yet. Then I am embarking on the trip to Eastern Europe, which has been confirmed. My two new friends have planned what sounds like an amazing experience. I just hope we won't run into any civil unrest... But we should be near internet spots along the way, I hope to be able to keep blogging. The trip will be 2-3 weeks. Then we'll see.

I'm closing down this blog entry with some new pics that have been in the making all this while. Definitivamente, in Crotone, me` scialat'! ('hope I got that right... spero di averlo scritto bene...)

5 months. I can't believe all I've seen and all I've met. Lucky, lucky me.